The Full Monty
by GokuBootz
Summary: Goku and Vegeta need money and it doesn't help when you don't have a job. And when you're threatened with losing your wife, or seeing your child, you'll go to any lengths to stop it happening. Even if it does mean STRIPPING in front of a crowd of women.
1. Strippers Ahoy!

_DISCLAIMER- I don't own it and I never will, unfortunately. It belongs to the great man that is, Akira Toriyama., and licensed by Toei Animation and Funimation._

**The Full Monty**

**Chapter One**

"YOU'RE FIRED!" A small blonde man hissed, as the door was slammed in the faces of two wild haired men.

They were confused at the situation, and how on earth they had just got fired. It couldn't have been because they told the man to go screw himself? That was in no way offensive to the two men, but it might have been to their boss.

They walked away, hands in their pockets, partially disappointed in themselves. After a few kilometres, they reached a pub (bar) and entered. They found some of their friends sitting knocking back pints of ale or sipping on glasses of whiskey. The group noticed the two and burst out laughing.

"Yet another job down the pan for Goku and Vegeta!" A small bald man sniggered, holding up his pint to the men. "What did you guys do this time?"

"We told the man to go fuck himself. I'm not cleaning up some brats vomit." The flame haired man hissed, ordering a beer at the counter. "Kakarot decided to do it instead, but ended up causing more of a mess, throwing the bucket of water over the disgusting child."

"The boss said we were irresponsible, immature and completely stupid. He also said we should grow some balls and act like men if we ever want to earn some money in this deadbeat world." The man named Kakarot answered, scratching the back of his head. "He fired us, so it means we have to join you guys at the job centre again, tomorrow."

"Ah well, just don't tell Chi-Chi, Goku," An aging man laughed, watching the duo remove their old work overalls, which were navy with an orange star on the right upper arm. The back was emblazoned with the words, 'Orange Star Primary School Janitor'.

"I don't plan to Roshi! You know what she's like every time I lose a job. She goes ballistic at me," Goku replied, sitting down opposite the man with a pint of ale in his hand. "I just find it hard to keep a job. I get bored very easily."

"How I lasted three days in that job without killing a child, I will never know." Vegeta said, sitting on one of the stools at the counter. "All those brats did was squeal and kick us."

"Except Trunks and Goten!" Goku corrected the man, beginning to drink. "I hope Goten doesn't tell her, or I'm staying at Vegeta's again."

"No you're not! You can sleep in bloody hell, for all I care! The last time you came, you projectile vomited all over my living room floor!" Vegeta raged, pointing at the man angrily. "You can sleep in the park!"

"I only puked because you made sandwiches with mouldy bread that was a week out of date. Don't blame me because you can't read food labels." Goku retaliated, frowning.

"Hey! Did you guys hear about the strippers coming to General Blues Bar, down on Penguin Street?" Krillin spoke excitedly, grabbing every male's attention at the mention of strippers and averting the conversation away from vomiting and spoiled food. "Next week, I think they're coming?"

"Kami, it'll be nice to see some eye candy for once, considering the women in this dump." Vegeta hissed, as Goku chuckled.

"You guys do know the strippers are male, don't you?" A blonde curly haired woman piped up from behind the bar. She stood rubbing the inside of a glass, whilst chewing on the end of a toothpick.

"Are you tryin' to say these strippers are male Launch? I thought stripping was only a job for women, like cooking?" Goku said, as Launch threw an empty can at the (unknowingly) insulting man.

"Yes, men can strip too. Men can't have all the fun, all the time!" Launch smirked, turning around and serving a customer.

"Here was me with my evening planned, and now ruined because of a stupid woman, as usual." Vegeta grumbled, pushing his empty glass out of the way. "Hey woman, another!"

"Ah well, as Launch says, we can't have all the fun all the time!" Goku smiled, shoving his glass in the direction of Launch, as though to tell her to refill. "Chi-Chi deserves to see a man with a decent job for once after being with me for nearly twenty years."

"Kami, Goku's tolerant, isn't he? Letting his wife go off and watch a man parade a bigger wang than his in front of her." A small fat bushy haired man breathed from the bar. Goku immediately spat out the liquid that was in his mouth, which ended up directly in Roshi's face.

"What you talkin' about Yajirobie?" Goku questioned, wiping the dribble of alcohol that slithered down his chin.

"Ooh, Kakarot feels challenged. Are we hiding something?" Vegeta queried, amused at the situation. If there was one thing Goku hated, it was being teased. Vegeta had a tendency to do it every day, just to get some sort of Saiyain reaction out of him. One of the worst spots for teasing a Saiyain was his performance as a man.

"I'm quite adequate, thank you very much!" Goku snapped, folding his arms along his chest and beginning to pout.

"Well, I wouldn't blame that Blue for having male strippers at his bar. I mean, he is not in the direction which we men go." Krillin pointed out, as every man grunted in response. "It will probably be poorly attended, compared to female stripper shows." Every man grunted yet again.

"Are you kidding me? That show totally sold out in three hours. We girls aren't missing a chance like this!" Launch jeered, resting her hands on her hips and looking at her usual customers haughtily.

"Are you saying, you women would pay to see men take their clothes off on stage every now and then?" Vegeta asked, quite disgusted.

"Yup! We ladies never get a little treat around here. It's always the men who get them!" Launch rolled her eyes, and began to wipe the counter with a cloth.

"That's because we do the most work, woman!" Vegeta snarled, taking a gulp of his beer.

"I hate you guys! You're a bunch of sexist pigs!" Launch moaned, as she heard some of the crowd of men laugh. "Well, it's true. You guy's never do anything for us women. For example," Launch pointed at Goku. "You never lift a finger round the house and help Chi-Chi."

"But Chi likes to do the housework." Goku whined, pouting at the ranting woman.

"Krillin and Roshi, you guys think women are just to look at."

"You can't blame a couple of guys who have lazy eyes?" Krillin defended, as Roshi nodded in agreement.

"And Vegeta is a man whore since Bulma dumped him four years ago."

"They love it!" Vegeta smirked smugly.

"And you all have excuses!" Launch squawked, walking into the back of the bar, out of sight.

"Let's go see what these guys think they have, that we don't." Goku said, rising from his chair, followed by the rest of the group, except Roshi and Yajirobie who stayed at the bar.

They had a ten minute walk to General Blue's bar, which was on the more fashionable side of town. It housed the women's shops containing, cosmetics, clothes, and hairdressing and beautician services. The men seemed a little uncomfortable as they walked through the street towards their destination, a few women looking oddly at the group.

"What's wrong with us walking through this street? It's not like we have shit on our face. It's a bloody free country!" Vegeta complained, as the men continued on their walk.

The group stopped before a poster of, handsome, gleaming smiles and baby oiled muscled men. The men narrowed their eyes as they looked at the men standing in police outfits, showing their well toned stomachs.

"I really don't see the appeal?" Krillin commented, looking at the poster and sneering.

"Police officers are over rated. The ones I know are donut guzzling fatso's!" Goku hummed, rolling his eyes. "Plus Chi likes firemen!"

"Didn't need to know that Kakarot." Vegeta spoke disgusted, tearing the poster from the wall and shoving it in the dustbin below it. "Just were that kind of crap should be."

"No use anyway, all the women have their tickets," Goku said, shrugging his shoulders. "Why they would wanna see a bunch of pansies is beyond me. It's clear they're not straight."

"We could do a better job than that bunch!" Vegeta grumbled, walking down the footpath, followed by Goku. Krillin had to run off and get ready for a job interview. "I'm far more superior than those pansies."

"Would be good money," Goku replied, scratching his chin in thought. "Roshi said they earn up to a grand a night. That's a lot of hot dogs." A slither of drool began running down his chin at the mention of hot dogs. "But I wouldn't do it."

"Why? You're a past fighter. You're fit and toned." Vegeta said, as Goku blushed lightly.

"That was in my younger days. I've put on a little baby weight since then Vegeta," Goku began to pat his stomach, as Vegeta rolled his eyes. "I don't wanna be a guy in my thirties with a tan and flaunting his muscles, that's kinda obscene if you ask me?"

"So, I'm obscene then Kakarot?" Vegeta asked, raising an eyebrow to the taller man.

"No, you're Vegeta."

"Hmm, but still, we could make some money outta this kind of thing. Launch said women would pay to see men take off their clothes."

"I think they would come to laugh at us, more like!" Goku groaned, turning a corner into the local park, which was littered with rubbish and housed a rusted and broken children's playground. The men then headed back in the direction their old workplace, Orange Star Primary School, to pick up their young sons Trunks and Goten.

"I wonder if Bulma and your harpy are going to that thing," Vegeta said, leaning against the pillar of the school. Goku sat on the ground beside him and looked up at the sky. "Imagine if your wife left you for one of the strippers!"

"Shut your face Vegeta! I don't even wanna think about something like that," Goku breathed, as his brow furrowed nervously at the concept. "I don't even think Chi would like a thing like that."

"I didn't think that the woman liked good boys, and now look at her with that stupid Spamcha."

"No offence Vegeta, but I wouldn't blame her." At these words, Goku was punched hard on the head and the bell rung inside the school signalling the end of the day for the children and a perfect cover up for Goku's swearing. "Ow, the kids are coming."

A herd of children began to emerge from the wide oak double doors, either excited to see their parents or trying to avoid being seen with them altogether. A lavender haired boy and a smiling child came running towards the two men. One of the children was identical to Goku in every way, from his hair to his grin. The other child held the same scowl to Vegeta and stood with the same hands in pocket pose as his father.

"Hey Goten, don't tell your mother I lost my job. I won't be in the house for a week if she finds out." Goku told, as Goten looked up at his father and nodded obediently. The child watched the whole scene where his father threw a bucket of water over one of his classmates, and found it extremely funny, although disappointing that his father had then lost his job.

"Trunks, tell Kakarot's wife he lost his job." Vegeta ordered Trunks, out of earshot of Goku, who was busy listening to Goten talking about his day.

"Yes Dad!" Trunks obeyed, waiting on the two males who lagged behind.

**A Few Hours Later**

"Goku? Is what Trunks just said true?" A small ebony haired woman questioned sternly, as her husband began to sweat nervously. It was dinner time in the Son household, and Goku sat down with his family, along with Vegeta and Trunks who invited themselves. The man in question remained silent, as he glared mercilessly at Trunks. "Goku, answer me!"

"Why would you believe Trunks over me? I am your husband and he is only an eight year old." Goku replied, shoving a spoonful of food in his mouth.

"Goku, I trust Trunks more than you. You're a scheming lazy bum, who lies to me nearly every single day. Trunks is far more of an adult than you'll ever be!" Chi-Chi said firmly, looking at her husband from the corner of her eye. "Now, did you get fired today?"

"Yes dear!" Goku answered finally, looking at the ground, like a little boy who was caught with his hand in the cookie jar. "It was Vegeta's fault. If he just did what the man asked him to do, then I wouldn't have been asked to clean it up."

"Don't bring me into this. This is your lover's spat," Vegeta hissed, pointing his fork at the moaning man. "If it's anyone's fault, it's that child's. He shouldn't have thrown up in the first place."

"Oh, you're both as bad as each other. You're just a couple of children in men's bodies," Chi-Chi snipped, clearing the table of empty plates and trays. "You two need to learn to grow up. You're both bad influences on our children, except Gohan."

"Any more insults harpy? I would just love some more!" Vegeta said sarcastically.

"Yes!" Chi-Chi uttered. "Get out of my house!"

"With pleasure!" Vegeta said, rising from his chair, followed closely by Trunks. He walked towards the back door, and made his way out. "See ya tomorrow Kakarot."

"Right" Goku smiled, waving to his friend with the back of his hand as he continued to eat.

"You better make some money within the next month Goku, or I swear you are never getting back in this house." Chi-Chi hissed, beginning to wash the dishes in the sink. "It's an ultimatum- no money, no home. Ever."

Goku turned to his kids and smiled nervously. Gohan, a tall seventeen year old with dark black spiky hair, sat reading a book whilst Goten continued to eat his food.

"Gohan, can you take Goten and his dinner upstairs while your mother and I talk?"

"No problem Dad!" Gohan replied, lifting Goten with one arm, and holding his dinner in his other free hand.

Once the two boys left the room, Goku turned and frowned at his wife, who was busying herself with the dishes. He could tell the small woman was angry, as her body stood stiff, and her hands were scrubbing the dishes harder than usual. This was a level three Chi-Chi tantrum, the highest of the levels.

"Please don't talk like that in front of the boys Chi?"

"Why? Is it so much worse than telling them you have no job and no money? I think it was pretty harmless if you ask me?"

"You will upset them, especially Goten."

"No it won't, because we've been near the edge of splitting more than a few times Goku. Why? No money and no job courtesy of Goku Son!" Chi-Chi yapped, slapping the drying cloth on the table hard, creating a smacking sound. Her face soon softened. "Goku, I know you miss your fighting and training, but as you know you can't do it anymore. You're too old to get a teaching certificate, and plus you're too dumb to get it. This is why I need you to go out and get a proper job to support your family."

"I know!" Goku sighed, looking at the ground, disenchanted.

"We've been through this thousand of times and it never seems to get through. This is why I'm giving you this ultimatum. I love you Goku, but I can't live like this anymore." Chi-Chi cried, tears beginning to form in her eyes.

Goku came to his wife's aid and wrapped his arms around her tight. He rubbed her back softly as she cried into the tall mans shoulder, her sniffing muffled in his shirt. He brought her out and looked at her, the tears still cascading down her face. He wiped them away with his thumb, whilst he smiled lightly at her.

"You look so much prettier when you're smiling Chi!" He commented, as Chi-Chi laughed slightly, looking away from her husband. "But if having me miserable in a job I hate will make you smile and your eyes sparkle again, then so be it."

"I don't want you to be miserable!"

"But if it makes you smile, then I want to be miserable. At least I can come home to cuddle you to make it all better, hmm? Will you cuddle me?" Goku grinned, as Chi-Chi fell into his chest and began to giggle. "Is that a yes?"

"Yes! But you will still get kicked out if you don't make any money in a month," Chi-Chi noted, pointing her finger into Goku's chest

"Deal!"

**The Next Day**

"Bloody HFIL!" Vegeta cursed, slamming the morning paper closed. He then picked it up and tore it in half, hopeful that the action would disintegrate the image that was blaring in his mind. He threw the pieces of torn paper over the table where he sat. "I don't want to see that image again."

"Hey! I just bought that!" Goku moaned, looking at the shreds of paper on the ground. "That thing you just ripped up costs money, y'know Vegeta?" The man slouched into his chair and put his hands behind his head, as though he was lying down. "What scared ya?"

"Men in Speedos... on page three. That's the naked ladies page, Kakarot," Vegeta winced, rubbing his temples, hoping that the action worked better than tearing up Goku's newspaper.

The pair sat in an unemployment office, which catered for the jobless. They searched the web and read newspapers for job vacancies, but the occupants just looked at the topless ladies in the newspapers and inappropriate images on the internet. So, no good was ever done.

"Do you mean the stripper guys Vegeta? Yeah, they're a nasty piece of work them," An aging man spat, as he typed at a computer behind the talking duo. "Damn them, taking away all those young women!"

"Shut up Roshi!" Vegeta ordered, as Goten, who sat beside Goku, looked at Roshi, confused.

"Dad? What's a stripper?" He questioned a puzzled look on his young features. "Is it a job?"

"It's a man or woman who takes off his or her clothes for people over the age of eighteen," Goku smiled proudly, clearly impressed at himself that he knew what a stripper was. He then began ruffling the youngster's hair affectionately.

"Oh, that must be what Mama and Auntie Bulma was talking about yesterday. They mentioned the word strippers when Bulma came over last night after you and Mama were talking, and how they were going to see some eye candy!" Goten spoke innocently, smiling widely at his father, who looked utterly dumbfounded.

"Ooh, Kakarot's got competition!" Vegeta cackled hysterically, hitting his fist hard on the table. Goku hid his head in his hands and whimpered slightly.

"Don't worry Goku; I hear they have tiny dicks!" A bald man yelled from the back of the room, the extra eye on his forehead roaming the room.

"They bloody better Tien!" Goku hissed, pointing at the man in question. "I can't help it if I have to come here every day just because I can't get a job. But I need to get one though by the end of the month."

"Why don't you go back to your fighting?" Vegeta questioned, stabbing his pen into the desk. "Couldn't you make money off of that?"

"Nah, Chi say I'm too old to fight and too dumb to teach. I'd have no luck going there." Goku sighed, laying his head on the desk. "What about you? You're not too dumb to teach?"

"I'd end up killing the students." Vegeta huffed, as Goku chuckled. "Then what are you going to do then? You've nearly had every job under the sun."

"Why not become a stripper Goku? You're a handsome guy," Krillin laughed, remembering about the upcoming strippers that were coming to town. "Plus it's something you've never been."

"I don't think Chi would be too pleased. Plus I've a seventeen year old and a youngster, so I think I'd only end up being laughed at," Goku grinned nervously. "Plus, I've put on a few pounds since I stopped training."

"Yeah, but if you think about it, we could make quite a few bob off this idea. Why would you want to see some bronzed male bimbos, when you can see some real men?" Roshi said, thinking about the idea.

"Roshi, if you're thinking of stripping, I think the whole female population would totally die out at the sight of your nudity," Goku chuckled, as Vegeta sniggered beside him. "I think we should leave it to the guys who know what they're doing."

"Don't put the idea totally down the pan Kakarot. If you want to make some money by the end of the month, then a little thing like this might do the trick." Vegeta furthered, as Goku looked at Vegeta in disbelief. "The economy is down the shit hole and jobs are scarce, giving you no chance of gaining any money by the end of the month or having a place to sleep."

"Can't I stay with you?"

"Shut up Kakarot, I'm talking," Vegeta snapped, shutting Goku up immediately. "So, having a little event like this might make us quite a few quid."

"Are you saying you wanna strip Vegeta?" Goku questioned a look of disbelief still on the man's face. "Why are you so up for it?"

"Yes, I want money and possibly some women," Vegeta answered, folding his arms along his chest. "Plus, the woman is threatening to keep the brat away from me. I need the money to pay her child support. If I don't, she's gonna ask the court for sole custody of the boy."

"Bummer. I guess we're both in hot water huh?" Goku muttered, as Vegeta nodded. "Well, I guess the idea might work. But if we're gonna do this, we need a know how to dance." Goku scratched his chin. "Who can teach us to dance?"

"We need a troupe first, before we can dance." Vegeta told. He turned around and slapped Krillin on his bald head. "Hey, Chrome Dome, wanna strip with me and Kakarot? You can meet a woman or whatever you want."

"There is nothing more attractive than a man who strips," Goku mockingly whispered sexily in Krillin's ear, causing the man to slap him away. "Come on, I'm doin' it and I have two kids who I'm gonna embarrass."

"I guess, but Goku man, you need a work out. You've gained a bit of a gut," Krillin agreed, pointing at Goku's somewhat protruding gut.

"Stop pointing out my bad parts!" Goku pouted, glaring at the man.

"Right, we have three. Who else?" Vegeta noted.

"Whoever has a meat and two veg, please come to me or Vegeta, if you want to be part of a strip show to make a quick buck. We have two places." Goku shouted to the whole room, but no one responded. "Come on, I'll have nowhere to go if we don't do this thing."

"Does this mean Daddy's gonna take his clothes off?" Goten questioned a bored looking Trunks, who seemed to be firing spit balls at the ceiling.

"I dunno?" The boy answered, continuing with his game of saliva and paper.

**End of Chapter One**

**I hope you all like it. I really want to continue this, as I have good ideas for it. It will not be an exact copy of the movie only with DBZ characters. It will be my style; it will be similar as how I wrote Under the Skin. I am only using the concept of the unemployment and becoming strippers for them. It's quite a real concept for them if you look at it. Goku never has a job, Vegeta's too arrogant to work and the rest just sit around and look at rude magazines. Chapter two will be up soon, when the plan comes into full swing.**

**Thank you!**

**GokuBootz**


	2. I'm Not Fat! I'm Broad!

_DISCLAIMER- I don't own it and I never will, unfortunately. It belongs to the great man that is, Akira Toriyama., and licensed by Toei Animation and Funimation._

**Thank You!**

**The Full Monty**

**Chapter Two- **_**I'm Not Fat, I'm Broad!"**_

It was a couple of days later and the idea of stripping was still fresh on the mind of Goku and Vegeta. They had pulled Krillin in on the idea and made their group a trio, but Vegeta wanted more than three. He feared all the attention would be on the guy who stood in the middle, putting less attention on the men who stood to the right and left. So, he saw it as only fair that there were five in troupe. But, unfortunately, no one else in the Job Club wanted to participate, putting the men in a bit of a pickle.

"For the last time Dad, no," Goku snarled, his head in his hands as his father sat before him, begging to be in the troupe. "You're too old and I don't want you there."

"You're just being discriminating Kakarot. I'm still a desirable male, just ask your mother." Bardock said in a matter of fact tone.

"Mama is dead,"

"But not in our hearts." Bardock swooned, holding his heart.

"For the last time old man, Kakarot said no." Vegeta grunted, hitting his fist on the table.

"Is everything alright in there, Goku?" Chi-Chi questioned from the living room, as the three men grouped in Goku's kitchen.

"Yes dear, you just watch your soaps," Goku yelled, and then turned back to the men that sat beside him. "Right, we have Krillin, you and me. So, you want two more?"

"Yes, I ain't having that much pressure on me!" Vegeta sneered, folding his arms across his chest.

"Why are you in the middle?" Goku queried, raising an eyebrow to the smaller man. "We didn't decide this?"

"I'm in the middle because I'm better than you." Vegeta smirked smugly.

"Stuck up cow," Bardock hissed, as Vegeta snarled at the aging Saiyain. "Well you are!"

"Who else are we goin' to get to dance with us?" Goku cried, swinging his head back in anguish and focussing his attention at looking at the ceiling. "Krillin was right, this is a bad idea!"

"How about your brothers?" Bardock suggested, looking at the pair

"I resent my brother. How could he marry a pillow for Kami sake." Vegeta grumbled, going into a slight huff at the mention of his brother.

"Can't have Turlus, for numerous reasons," Goku spoke, his eyes never leaving the ceiling. "But Raditz likes his women," Goku brought his head forward and began to scratch his chin. "He just might do it actually." He lifted himself from his chair and went to obtain the telephone that sat out in the hallway. "Well done, Dad!"

"Got any bright ideas about the fifth member?" Vegeta asked, glaring at the man. He never liked him, he was just too forgetful and dumb like his son, Kakarot. Vegeta could only handle one Kakarot, and how he survived sitting in the kitchen with the two of them, he will never know.

"Me?" Bardock asked desperately pointing at himself, but was responded with Vegeta getting up from his chair and walking out the back door. "That's a no then?"

**A Few Days Later**

"You're dad wanted to be in the troupe?" Krillin said, as he listened to Vegeta and Goku talk beside him. It was the usual case of the men sitting in the job centre, just like every weekday until three in the afternoon. "At least it's not as bad as Roshi wanting to be in it."

"Good point," Goku agreed, pursing his lips. "But I still don't want my dad on stage with me. It's bad enough I got Raditz in the group."

"You got Raditz, that womanizing git? Is he even gonna be able to do the routine in front of all those women, without zoning out, jumping off the stage and chatting up all the women?" Krillin said, in a shocked tone. "I doubt his mind is on the money. I think his dick is directing him."

"Ah well, we only need one more," Goku said happily.

Suddenly, a knock at the door startled the men who began to shuffle and begin to look busy. All inappropriate magazines were shoved under the table, and all unsuitable websites were closed. The door finally opened to reveal a man dressed in a tracksuit, and his hair pulled back in a messy ponytail. His face was emblazoned with scars on his cheek and eye.

"Like sitting with Kakarot wasn't bad enough, now I have to sit with Spamcha?" Vegeta grumbled, as the man sat in a chair beside Goku, who smiled widely. "What are you doin' here? I thought you worked down at that gym down by Jingle Road?"

"The gym went bankrupt and now everyone has lost their jobs, so I'm here," Yamcha sighed miserably. "I don't exactly want to be sitting with you every day either Vegeta."

"Wanna be a stripper?" Goku piped, but was soon slapped on the back of the head by Vegeta.

"No! Bad, Kakarot!" Vegeta snarled, as Goku rubbed his head.

"But he's a guy we haven't asked yet? He might say yes?" Goku sniffed, as Vegeta muttered something rude under his breath. Goku turned back to Yamcha and smiled again. "Well, wanna be a stripper."

"You didn't even say hello, but you ask me if I wanna be a stripper? Why would you ask me that?" Yamcha laughed nervously.

"Vegeta, me, Krillin and Raditz are going to do a strip show and make some money." Goku grinned innocently, as though there was nothing wrong with the concept.

"Why in Kami's name would you guys wanna do that for?" Yamcha questioned, looking at Goku in disbelief.

"Chi's gonna kick me out of my house forever if I don't make any money by the end of the month. Vegeta wants to make some money for a private matter, and Krillin and Raditz want some women." Goku explained, counting the individuals on his fingers. "So, wanna join us? It might be good money?"

"Aw, come on Yamcha. The ladies will go mad for you." Krillin complimented, as Goku raised his eyebrows in agreement. "It's just one night."

"Chi and Bulma are going tonight. I don't want Chi to go." Goku sighed sadly.

"You go to strip clubs all the time Kakarot, what the big deal if a man parades naked in front of your woman?" Vegeta laughed, as Goku glared.

"I only go because you drag me there!" Goku ranted. "And plus you wouldn't understand. You're not a husband."

"I don't care any way," Vegeta grumbled, drawing a pair of breasts on Krillin's filled out job application form. "Does the woman know you have no job?" He looked towards Yamcha who began to twitch nervously. "Why're you twitching? Do you think I'm goin' to black mail you Spamcha?"

"Someone's lied to Bulma." Goku teased.

"GOKU!" Yamcha snarled, as Goku laughed, holding up his hands in defence.

"You do this thing and we won't tell the woman you're jobless!" Vegeta ordered, pointing his finger with authority at the man. "Well?"

"FINE!" Yamcha snapped, a frown appearing on his face. "I only came here to get a job, not to strip in front of women."

"Right we have five, what now Vegeta?" Goku asked.

"We go to the pub." Vegeta answered, heading in the direction of the door, followed closely by everyone in the room, except Yamcha, who sat alone, totally bewildered at what he had just got himself sucked into.

**A Few Hours Later**

"Do you have to go?" Goku whined, as he watched his wife apply mascara to her eyelids, her tongue sticking unattractively out of the corner of her mouth. "You know I can't put Goten to bed. He eats sugar for badness, and is hyper all night. That kid is against me."

"I'm goin' Goku, end of!" Chi-Chi sighed, annoyed. She put the mascara brush back in its tube and turned to face her husband, who was looking at the ground sadly. "I think I need a night out with the girl's once in awhile, don't you?"

"I know, but strippers?"

"Oh, yeah right. Like you weren't checking out that stripper at Red's? Juu saw you, you can't deny it!" Chi-Chi said, angrily.

"For the last time, I was checking if it was Bulma! She had the exact same hairstyle and hair colour!" Goku defended, as Chi-Chi began to rustle in her handbag. "And Vegeta dragged me along."

"Pfft, the next thing you'll be saying is you were admiring her lingerie." Chi-Chi hissed, as Goku glared at his wife.

"Just don't come back drunk!" Goku grunted, walking out of the room and slamming the door hard.

"IF I DO, YOU'RE SLEEPING ON THE SOFA GOKU!" Chi-Chi yelled from the bedroom.

"WHATEVER!" Goku shouted back, and was responded with silence.

Goku made his way downstairs, all the way thinking of his wife. He loved her dearly, but she had a tendency to go too far when they argued, causing a fall out that could stretch for days. She was also hurtful some times, but he had to understand the funny side just as she did. But with some of the things she said to him, like letting himself go a bit, he wouldn't get away with, if he said anything like that to her.

"Were you and Mom bickering again, Dad?" Gohan questioned, as he sat on the sofa watching the television.

"It's nothin', go back to watchin' telly." Goku told, walking into the kitchen and to the fridge. As Goku raised his head from out of the fridge, he heard a car toot outside, and he heard Chi-Chi rushing down the stairs. He heard her say her goodbyes to her sons, and then heard the clicking of her heels coming towards the kitchen.

She appeared at the door, dressed in a black pencil skirt and a short sleeved blue button up blouse. Her raven locks were tied back in a loose ponytail, and her lips shone a deep red. She smiled and walked towards her husband and hugged him tightly.

"Don't take anything I say serious, Goku. You know I'm only takin' the piss." Chi-Chi smiled up at her husband and kissed him on the cheek, leaving a red mark. "Now, I've hidden all the sugar, so Goten will have none, unless he has a hidden stash. I advise you to search his room, and get rid of it by any means. Either you eat it, or throw it in the fire."

"I'm gonna cut out the sugar, I'm thinking of goin' on a diet," Goku announced, as Chi-Chi tried not to laugh. "What? I can go on a diet!"

"Whatever you say, dear. I love you!" Chi-Chi blew her husband a kiss as she walked out the door towards the living room.

"DAD, FLASH DANCE IS ON!" Gohan hollered from the living room

"Ooh, Flash Dance." Goku cheered, forgetting his wife and hurrying into the living room. He sat down beside Gohan and grabbed the television remote, and turned the volume up.

**The Next Afternoon**

"So, Kakarot, did your wife enjoy the strippin'?" Vegeta asked with a noticeable sneer on his face. It was the next day and they were gathered at the Job Club, just like any weekday. "Did you drown your sorrows thinking about your inadequateness to them?"

"Shut your mouth before I shove this fork where the sun doesn't shine." Goku snarled, holding up the fork in question. "But yes, I did get drunk, and ended up on the sofa, while drunken Chi slept upstairs."

"Is this why you are so grumpy?" Krillin asked, raising an eyebrow at the somewhat annoyed man. "Because you slept on the couch?"

"No!" Goku hissed, dropping his head, causing his fringe to shadow his eyes, making him look more moody.

"Well what is it?" Vegeta asked with a tone of irritation in his voice. He hated it when Goku was in a bad mood and wouldn't talk about it. He always seemed to drag it out and used it against people as a way of getting out of a stitch. "Tell us, before I grab that fork and put it in a place where the sun doesn't shine on you."

"Chi-Chi says I'm fat," Goku pouted, as every man in the room began to laugh hysterically. "I'm not fat, I'm just broad. She told me when she came home, and that woman doesn't hold her tongue when she's drunk."

"No Goku, you're fat. You're eating a whole eight pack of double chocolate muffins right now." Yamcha said, pointing at the packet of muffins, which only one was left. Vegeta grabbed it and stuffed it in his mouth.

"I'm troubled!" Goku replied, reaching for the last muffin, but found it was gone. "VEGETA!"

"I did you a favour. I spared you four hundred calories." Vegeta smirked, licking the crumbs off his fingers. "You're one of a hundredth of a way to loosing something."

"Hi guys!" A voice chimed from the door. The group turned around and found Gohan standing with his backpack slung over his shoulder. He closed the door and sat on the table beside his father. "I heard you shoutin' Dad. What's up?"

"Vegeta stole my muffin. Go get me another one?" Goku demanded, as Gohan chuckled.

"You don't need any more muffins, Dad."

"See, even your son thinks your fat!" A raspy voice hissed from behind Gohan. It was Raditz, who had decided to join his brother at the Job Club, as he was bored of listening to his father rant about the state of the kitchen. "How's it goin' lil big brat?"

"Great," Gohan replied, smiling at his uncle. He then turned back to his father. "But Dad isn't fat, he's just carrying, as he puts it, some baby weight. Plus Mom stopped him trainin' 'cause she thought it was a bad influence on Goten and I. He just needs to start workin' out again."

"Thank you Gohan. You always have my back," Goku smiled, but soon dropped again. "Does this mean you won't get me a muffin?"

"Anyway, Dad told me to come here because he said I could help with your lil show?" Gohan grinned, but it soon vanished once he got a murderous glare from Vegeta. "Dad says I'd be the best. I'm smart, and I know how to get you guys a lot of money."

"I thought he could help, because he's a very smart boy. He can sort out the business side of everything, while we take off our clothes," Goku added in. "And we have to dance. You want money, you're gonna have t' dance Veggie Man." Vegeta's eyes went wide.

"I stand there, pull my pants down. End of. No dancing involved," Vegeta growled, as everyone in the room, sweat dropped. "That's the way it's goin' to be."

"Yeah, but Vegeta, if you were a woman, how entertainin' would you find that?" Gohan queried, as Vegeta's brow began to furrow in concentration. "It's wouldn't be sexy if a female stripper didn't dance, would it?"

"He's right, Vegeta." Goku said, as Vegeta looked at him from the corner of his eye.

"Fine! I'll dance. I better make a lot of money from this?" Vegeta growled, holding up his hands, as though defeated.

"So, how much are you thinking of selling tickets for?" Gohan asked, taking out his notepad. "The strippers at Blues sold tickets for ten bucks each."

"How many women were there?" Krillin questioned, as Gohan hit his pen against his lip.

"I'd say, over a thousand, which made a profit of ten thousand. Then divide that by six, and each man got roughly over one thousand, six hundred bucks."

"What if we sold our tickets for fifteen quid? How much would we make out of the five of us?" Goku questioned, as Gohan scribbled in his notebook.

"So, if you sell one thousand tickets, you will make fifteen thousand. Then fifteen thousand divided by five, will give you each three thousand."

"Why the hell didn't we do this before?" Krillin exclaimed, trying to get his head around the amount of money he could make out of one nights stripping.

"Because Kakarot's fat." Vegeta cackled, causing Goku to pout.

"Now, who says we're goin' t' get a thousand women?"

"If people found out it were you guys, they'd be willing," Gohan commented, as Goku nodded his head in agreement. "Now, we need a choreographer. Any ideas guys?" Gohan kept the questions coming, and writing the answers in his notebook.

"All the dancing I know happens down at the community centre, and that's for the old bittys." Yamcha spoke, his head resting on his fist.

"Shut up Spamcha." Vegeta hissed, as Yamcha gave him the middle finger. "No one needs your opinion."

"You guys need a choreographer?" Tien spoke from the back of the room. "I've an old family friend who could help you with that?"

"Really, Tien? That'd be great!" Goku beamed, his mood somewhat lifted.

"You tell me the time and place and I'll organise for him to come see you guys."

"Come to Roshi's place after Job Club tomorrow." Goku ordered, pointing his finger at Tien in authority.

"There is no Job Club tomorrow." Vegeta said.

"Well, Roshi's place at three thirty then."

**Kame House, The Next Day**

"Where the hell is Kakarot? It's already four bloody fifteen!" Vegeta snarled, looking out through the window into the empty street. "Wait, here's the big brat."

Gohan came strolling in the door and hung his backpack on the coat hook. When he turned around, he found everyone looking at him, as though they had lost something, or someone.

"Where's your father lil big brat?" Raditz asked, as Gohan sat down on the red sofa.

"Is he not here?" Gohan replied, and then looked around the room; his father was nowhere to be seen. "Um, I'm just back from after school study, so I've not seen him since this morning."

"So, you've no idea?" Vegeta hissed, as Gohan shook his head.

"Maybe he's at home. The last time I saw him he was doin' press ups with Goten on his back. Maybe he hurt himself?"

"That's typical of him. He always is gettin' hurt when we need him." Vegeta groaned, stomping out the door. "Come on, I'll probably need you all to carry the big lump."

It was a good twenty minute walk to Goku's neighbourhood, but the scorn on Vegeta's face was unmoving. They arrived at his door, and knocked rudely, were replied with a loud groan, that didn't sound too far from the door. Vegeta peeked through the letterbox, and found the lump that was Goku, lying in a heap on the floor, whilst being sat on by Trunks and Goten. His head rose slightly, but went back down again.

"Get these brats off of me, please? I said please, so do it already!"

"Open the door, big brat!" Vegeta growled, as Gohan put the key in the lock.

"Dad! Are you okay? Can you get up?" Gohan worried, as he bent down to his father's level.

"I have two children on my back, do I look okay? Of course not! Now get them off me, NOW!" Goku snapped, as the two children ran upstairs, scared of the yelling man. Goku attempted to stand, but it was no good. "Great, now they've did my back in. Why couldn't I stay younger?"

"Because you decided to knock your woman up when she was seventeen," Vegeta answered, as Goku cried silently into the floor. "Now get up, old man."

Gohan put his arm around his father, and heaved him up off the ground. Goku winced in pain, as his body stood up straight. The teenager walked him to the sofa, and laid him down lightly. None of the other men helped, and watched the whole scene with amusement. Goku Son, the great martial artist, did his back in by two children.

"This is not in any way funny. You guys are bachelors, and have the time to work out, I don't." Goku cried, as the laughing became greater. "Did the choreographer guy come?"

"Yes Goku, he's right here." Tien spoke through a fit of giggling, bringing the little man forward.

The small man had bright red cheeks and his entire body was painted white. He wore what looked like a leotard, with a frilly tutu around his waist. But to make this little man unique, he wore a bobble hat with it all. Goku looked at the man in disbelief.

"You're gonna teach us how to strip?"

"Strip? What do you mean by 'strip'?" He asked, as the room went silent. "Tien told me that you needed a choreographer. He said nothing about stripping," He turned to Tien. "I am not that type of teacher, old friend. I am a ballet dancer. I will see you soon." The man walked out the door, but soon poked his head in again. "And I hope you get better soon Goku."

"Thank you," Goku called after, and then looked at Tien and laughed. "You brought a ballet dancer to teach _us_ to dance? Are you mad? You knew rightly that we're gonna strip. What good was he gonna do?"

"I was only tryin' to help." Tien answered, hunching over, defeated.

"We have no choreographer again. What are going to do now?" Krillin cried, as everyone hunched their shoulders, except Goku who found it painful.

"We could watch movies?" Gohan suggested. "Dad told me about this stripping thing last night and he and I watched Flash Dance. We watched it for research but Dad didn't seem to be watching it for that."

"Gohan," Goku hissed, as Gohan chuckled. "Shut your mouth."

"You could watch other movies for tips on dancing."

"Well, we can't watch Flash Dance without Goku breakin' into song. What else can we watch?" Krillin asked his peers as Goku began to hum 'What A Feeling'.

**End of Chapter Two**

**Goku just has a bit of fat on his belly, and lost his usually toned torso, so he's just a lil chubby. Choreography and dancing will be in the next chapter, and Goku will hopefully be healed. Probably will be more of the ladies in the next chapter, and their suspicions. And also thanks for the reviews and stuff. It means a lot. So, please REVIEW.  
**

**As Always,**

**Thank You!**

**GokuBootz**


	3. Swing Wi' Me!

_DISCLAIMER- I don't own it and I never will, unfortunately. It belongs to the great man that is, Akira Toriyama., and licensed by Toei Animation and Funimation. Also I don't own the Teletubbies. (sweatdrops!)_

**Thank You!**

**The Full Monty **

**Chapter 3- **_Swing Wi' Me!_**  
**

"What is this? What am I supposed to do with this?" Goku questioned, as Raditz handed his brother a black wide belt. "Is it a belt to go with my gi?"

"Why would I give you one of those when you don't even train or compete anymore?" Raditz snipped, snatching the object from the man's hand.

"Hello children," Vegeta called as he entered into the room. The group had gathered at the old gym that went bankrupt and had made Yamcha lose his job. It was a very large complex and sat on the deserted outskirts of the city centre. They all agreed it was a good hideout to practice, as the whole area was literally empty, and it was private.

"Hey Vegeta. Got any ideas for dancin'?" Goku smiled.

"No, and I refuse to choreograph. If I was in charge, you'd all be dropping your pants and walking off stage." Vegeta grumbled, lifting a desolate dumb bell and began to pump his arm. "Are you feeling better?"

"Yeah, Ox King gave me a good pat on the back. A _good_ pat on the back." Goku replied, rubbing his lower back. "I swear he clicked something out of place, while he popped something back in."

"Ah well," Raditz puffed, fastening the black belt around Goku's middle. "At least you can get rid of that stomach of yours now." He flicked a green switch and stood back.

Goku frowned at his brother and looked down at the thing that was tied around his stomach. What was he doing? What was a piece of black cloth going to do with his flab? Goku suddenly felt a tingling sensation on his stomach, as Raditz began to laugh.

"What is that thing?" Vegeta questioned, watching as Goku's face began to twitch.

"It's a muscle toner. It sends shocks into his abdominal muscles and exercises them. In other words he won't look fat anymore."

"But why are you laughin'?"

"It tones the muscles with electric shocks, and I have it on the highest level. He's in for a world of pain." Raditz cackled, as Vegeta joined in.

"Why're you guy's lauARGHHHHHHHHHHHH! GET THIS THING OFF ME!" Goku screamed, as a large electric pulse went into his stomach. He keeled over, and every time he went to remove it, a pulse struck him, causing him to groan. "WHY DO YOU DO THESE THINGS TO ME?"

"Aw, I'm glad I fiddled with the mechanisms. It's not supposed to be like that. I just wanted to hurt him." Raditz cackled, as Vegeta was on the floor, hurting himself with laughter. Goku was now unable to move as the item continued to shock him.

"Please...I beg you...get this effing thing... off me." Goku cried into the floor.

Over forty five minutes later, the rest of the group had arrived. Goku now sat with his hair higher than usual with a few sparks flashing from the ends. Vegeta and Raditz still suffered from stomach pains and tears from their uncontrollable hysterics. Just to be safe, Goku sat as far from the duo as possible, in regards to his safety.

"From now on, I will not ask for help from you, Raditz." Goku said, rubbing his sore abdomen. "All you ever do to me is cause pain."

"It was worth it." Raditz smirked, folding the black belt and shoving it into a polythene bag.

"As much as we are concerned about Goku and his weight gain, we still have a routine to do. And we have three weeks till Goku is chucked out." Krillin spoke orderly, as though he was the leader of the group.

"Four weeks. Last week was the end of a month, so she's giving me till the end of this month." Goku revealed, as Krillin sighed in relief.

"Oh, thank Kami. We have an extra week."

"But then again, this is February, and it only has three full weeks. Maybe we don't have an extra week, after all." Goku rambled, scratching his chin. "Y'know, I'm just gonna shut up, and let you guys silently freak out."

"Why does Goku do these things to us?" Krillin wailed, as he began to bang his head on the table. "All I want is some ladies, but I can't stop thinking about Goku and his dilemma. He's ruining my life."

"Aww, I love you too, buddy." Goku cooed, patting Krillin on the head. "But, I do have a few ideas about the dance, if you're interested?"

"You have ideas? When did you come up with ideas?" Yamcha queried, raising an eyebrow at the man.

"When I was lying on my aching back doin' frig all. I'm sorry, but you're stupid." Goku said, waving his finger at the man, and decided for no reason at all, to slap the man over the head. "And I told Goten to pop some movies in the DVD player for me. So I've watched quite a few dance movies."

"What movies?" Raditz asked. "I watched tons of stripper movies and learnt nothing."

"That's because you're too busy watching the women's tits, just like usual." Goku spat. He was annoyed at his brother, and he wanted him to feel his wrath. "I watched Flashdance, Footloose, um... I watched Dirty Dancing with Chi and Fame; and Striptease and Showgirls, when Chi wasn't in."

"You have Showgirls? Give it?" Vegeta asked, holding out his hands, as Goku gave him the DVD. Vegeta stared at the cover, as a river of drool ran down the man's chin.

"And, ignoring Vegeta's guilty pleasure, shall we make a dance?" Krillin laughed.

All the men, except Vegeta who remained drooling at the table at the half naked lady on the cover of the DVD, rose from the hard floor and made their way to the other side of the room. Vegeta remained at the table for a further ten minutes, until Goku got fed up. He snatched the DVD and placed it in the highest perch in the room, out of Vegeta's reach.

"Damn you Kakarot, for your blasted lankiness and no sense of humour." Vegeta snarled, jumping to reach the DVD.

"No, I do have a sense of humour! I just don't have a sense of humour when the piss take is taken out on me! What you did really hurt, and it was mean." Goku pouted, dragging Vegeta away from his favourite movie of all time.

"Oh, you're such a woman, sometimes." Vegeta hissed, as he joined the rest of the group.

"Alright, let's boogie, Kakarot." Raditz smirked, folding his arms across his chest.

"Did you guys bring music?" Goku asked, as he brought out some CD's from his trench coat. "I'm not that big on music, so I don't have that much. These are Chi's." He set them in the middle of the group, as the rest began to reveal their choices.

"I am not dancing to 'You Sexy Thing'! I refuse to!" Vegeta growled, holding the CD in his hand.

"Lighten up, Vegeta. We can't dance to Iron Maiden, unless we want to head bang, or somethin'? Krillin laughed, as Vegeta snorted.

"We could always dress as Teletubbies, and strip to the Teletubbies theme tune." Raditz cackled, as everyone burst out laughing. "We'll make the Teletubbies sexy."

"Winky-Winky, Dicky, Yes-Yes, and Blow." Vegeta snorted, as everyone fell over laughing.

"Okay guys, let's get serious." Krillin said through a fit of laughing. He began to look amongst the records. "We'll just use 'You Sexy Thing' for Goku to show us what he's learnt."

"Aw, do I have to? I've gone all shy." Goku mumbled, as Krillin loaded the CD into the player.

"Get up Kakarot! I want to see you make an idiot of yourself." Vegeta scoffed, as Goku made his way to the middle of the floor.

"Okay G..."

"DAD!" The door suddenly flung open, and the figures of Goten and Trunks dashed into the room. They were slowly followed by Gohan, who shut the door quietly.

"Do you have no manners, boy?" Vegeta growled, as Trunks stood before his father.

"No. You taught me not to." Trunks answered, as Vegeta rolled his eyes.

"Hey squirt, how was school? Boring, as usual?" Goku smiled, as he ruffled his son's hair affectionately. He then turned to Gohan. "What are you guys doin' here anyways?"

"Mom went shopping with Bulma, and left the squirts with me. Mom wants you home by six, by the way." Gohan answered, as he stood beside his father. The boy was at least half a foot taller and his father had to look up at him. "What are you up to?"

"I was just about to dance." Goku blushed, a light pink flushing his cheeks.

"Daddy's got a fever, Gohan. His face is goin' red." Goten said worriedly, his little eyes looking anxiously at his father.

"I'm not ill; I'm just a lil embarrassed, that's all." Goku laughed nervously. "Now, go and play with Trunks." Goku then turned to his eldest. "Please don't look when I dance?"

"I can assure Goten doesn't, but I can't promise I won't." Gohan grinned cunningly, as he went to join the youngsters, who were climbing a frame that used to hold weights.

"Right, are you ready Goku?" Krillin asked, his finger hovering over the play button on the CD player.

"Hell no! I wanna go home." Goku whimpered, as he saw Gohan wave at his father. "Piss off, Gohan!"

"Go you unsexy thing!" Raditz cackled, as Goku remained still. The music began to play, but Goku just twiddled his fingers. "Come on, Kakarot! Show us how to move!"

Goku took a deep breath in to erase the butterflies that were fluttering in his stomach. He exhaled, which released the tension that had built up in his muscles. He closed his eyes so he could not see his friends and children, and imagined he was in his bedroom dancing in front of his wife's vanity table mirror.

Goku had to admit that many of the movies didn't help much. Dirty Dancing helped a bit, as it taught you how to gyrate his hips, and how to jump off a stage. Many of the stripper movies showed how they teased with their clothing, so he thought that men could do that too. They slithered their bodies sexily, showing off their toned and bronzed bodies. Goku sighed.

"The songs nearly over, Goku, and you haven't done anything? Be Johnny Castle and teach us to dance." Yamcha teased, as Goku frowned.

"Fine, but if you wanna learn, you're gonna get up here and dance with me!" Goku ordered, pointing at the ground. "Now!"

The four men rose from the ground hesitantly, as Goku walked over and stood in the middle. He smiled broadly.

"I don't feel as embarrassed now."

"Good for you." Vegeta hissed.

"Now, in Dirty Dancing, they gyrate. Like this," Goku began to swing his hips as the men blushed slightly. "Oh come on, we do it with our ladies. Now, swing wi' me."

"I hope you mean that in a dancin' sense Kakarot, and not the other." Vegeta said, in a disgusted tone.

"I feel dirty." Krillin said, embarrassed.

"Can someone remind me why I am doing this again?" Yamcha questioned, as he watched Goku burst into a fit of hysterics at Vegeta. "I have no reason for doing this. I have money and I don't need any women."

"You open your mouth again, Spamcha, or I'll tell the woman you have no job." Vegeta snarled, glaring at the man. "How much will she like you with no job, hmm?"

"Fine!" Yamcha hissed, returning to copy Goku's dance move.

"We can make it a lil rock n roll for you, Vegeta? This way seems a lil bit pansy, womanly, if you get what I mean?" Goku spoke, making the jolts rougher, and swinging his shoulders in and out. "I know you have a rough reputation to uphold."

Half an hour had passed, and the men were soon getting into the swing of things. Everyone's tensions were soon lifting as they all began to laugh amongst each other, they were actually having fun. Goku stepped forward and began to demonstrate a new move.

"I think we need to learn how to tease."

"Tease?" Everyone said in unison.

"Y'know, tease. Taking your clothes off."

"Like burlesque, Goku?" Krillin asked, as Goku looked confused.

"What's that?"

"You ever see a girl writhe in a martini glass, takin' somethin' off seductively?" Krillin explained, as Goku nodded. "That is burlesque."

"Yes, but they're all dressed up. I refuse to dress up." Vegeta moaned, crossing his arms and sitting on the ground again.

"It's not like we're goin' out in corsets and suspenders, like in the Rocky Horror Picture Show, Vegeta. We aren't women." Krillin laughed at the man's stupidity. "We're men. We dress up in uniform."

"Uniform? That's still dressing up!" Vegeta snarled, as Krillin stepped back a little in fear. "I refuse to look like a hero! I am a villain!"

"We dress up? Cool," Goku cheered like an excited child. "I wanna be a fire fighter."

"Why a fire fighter?" Yamcha asked with a raised eyebrow. "Why you wanna dress up as one of those?"

Goku blushed slightly, and scratched the back of his head. "Chi likes fire fighters."

"Eugh, every woman loves a fire fighter. With their ripped bodies and always looking like heroes in front of our women, and making us look like crap, while they gleam their perfect grin." Yamcha groaned, remembering his last encounter with the fire brigade with Bulma. "Bulma looked like she was going to explode with happiness."

"But it's fun. You get to carry her over your shoulder and upstairs. You're the boss if you're a fire fighter, because your woman is weak at the knees with awe." Goku fought, as he stood with his hands on his hips, firmly.

"I think Goku's had experience of dressing as a fire fighter?" Krillin said, as he watched Goku explain his desire to be a fire fighter. Though it had nothing to do about saving people from burning buildings or saving cats from trees, he did have a point about the women part.

"We are not the Village People! I hate police officers, and I am not a sheep! "Vegeta hollered at Raditz, who backed away. "All those pricks at Blue's dressed as Law Enforcers! I want to look respectful, and the women falling at my feet."

"Then dress as a fire fighter, Vegeta. Women always fall at the feet of those guys; Goku says so." Krillin said nervously, as Vegeta glared daggers at the man.

Goku walked over to Vegeta and whispered in his ear. "Think about it, Vegeta. Bulma might dump Yamcha and come back to you. Imagine, Bulma might be all yours again, if you just dressed up in a fire uniform."

Vegeta's face went wide with hope at Goku's revelation. Would Bulma come back to him if he dressed up as a fire fighter? Would she dump the prick he called Spamcha for him, all because of a uniform? If this worked, then he wouldn't have to pay blasted child support again, and he wouldn't have to fight to see his son.

"Well?" Goku asked quietly, being careful no one else heard him. The rest of the group were too busy bickering amongst themselves. "How about it?"

"Fine! But this better work. If it doesn't then your head is on the line."

"Veggie's gonna dress up." Goku announced, but was soon slapped over the head by Vegeta. "OW!"

"So, we're fire fighters, then?" Raditz asked, as Goku nodded his head excitedly. "Oh, great."

Over the next few days, the men practiced whenever they found the time. A routine had been figured out somewhat. Goku had been put in charge of choreography, and everyone expected him to come up with the goods. And he did. Goku had watched Flashdance and Dirty Dancing another few times, and had incorporated some ball room and eighties dancing into their little show.

"I must say Vegeta, you have very pretty eyes." Goku smiled, as he and Vegeta prepared to tango from the back of the group to the front. Vegeta snarled, as Goku laughed.

"Just shut your mouth as you dance Kakarot, or a fist might fly in and kill you!"

"Oh, lighten up, Vegeta. I was only joking." The man chuckled, as he and Vegeta tangoed up the room. "At least you're not dancing with Turlus. He'd have his tongue down your throat by now."

Vegeta shivered at the thought. Goku's brother was a scary man. He wasn't gay, but he would do anything for a laugh, sober or drunk. Vegeta had to admit, that he was glad he danced with Goku, as he was just dumb, not wild like his brother.

"Right, I was planning that when me and Vegeta got to the end of the stage, that we jump off." Goku told, but the idea was greeted with shocked expressions. "What?"

"Goku, are you mad? Do you know what women are like with strippers? They're complete animals! They'll eat you and Vegeta alive, if you both jump off that stage." Raditz screamed.

"He's right, y'know Goku." Krillin agreed, wiping his bald head with a handkerchief.

"Yeah, I know. That's why I ordered Gohan to get a guard or fence thing to keep the women at bay." Goku told, as all the men looked at each other with unease. "I planned ahead guys, don't worry. Well, when I say 'I', I mean Gohan."

"Wise Kid." Yamcha commented, as everyone nodded with agreement.

"Oh man, it's six thirty! I gotta get home." Goku fretted, as he grabbed his coat. He turned to the others as he put it on. "I'll see you guys tomorrow." He dashed out the door and disappeared for the night.

"Wow, Goku's taking this really seriously. He's working so hard." Krillin said, as everyone grabbed their coats. "He must really love Chi-Chi if he's willing to do this just to stay with her?"

"He has been with that harpy for nearly twenty years. Of course he loves her, you dildo!" Vegeta grumbled, as he went over and picked up sleeping Trunks. "Plus, he has kids. He's doing it for them as well. But unfortunately, you wouldn't understand that, Chrome Dome." Vegeta walked out the door, and left the men to contemplate what he just said.

Vegeta walked down the street, with Trunks sleeping peacefully in his father's arms. He looked at the child and smiled. He loved the boy very much, even though he wouldn't say it in public. The boy idolised him, and thought everything he did was right. His attitude had rubbed off on the boy, and he treated Goku's youngest, Goten, as he himself treated Goku. His legacy lived on.

"SHIT! SHIIT! SHIT! SHIT!"

Vegeta turned around and saw Goku hurrying back into the deserted gym, and re-emerge seconds later with a sleeping Goten in his arms. He shook his head and laughed at the man's idiocy.

"YOU SAW NOTHING VEGETA!"

"YES KAKAROT, NOTHING!"

Goku soon disappeared again, and Vegeta continued on his journey to his son's mothers. She was probably worried sick about her eight year old son being out on a dark cold February night. She did not trust Vegeta one bit, and it was a reason why she decided to call it a day with him.

He was always out gallivanting by himself, either he was at a strip club or at the pub with Goku. Vegeta hated to be tied down, and liked to get out. It bored him to be in the same place all day, all week and all year. It was a reason why he couldn't stay in a job; he had to keep broadening his horizons.

His attitude also had a good reason for him not keeping a job. He hated to be told what to do. He preferred to be doing his own thing, like sitting having a drink. His attitude also contributed to his relationship with Bulma. They were both fiery souls, and clashed. They were so alike, that it was impossible for them to ever stay together. It was best the way it ended; agreement and acceptance that they could never stay together. But Vegeta didn't want it, he wanted to stay together.

Vegeta knocked on the clean white PVC door. The hallway light sparked alive, and a figure could be seen walking to the door. It opened to reveal a woman with her cerulean hair cut into a neat crop, and dressed in a pair of tracksuit bottoms, a vest and a night robe. She frowned at Vegeta.

"And what time do you call this, Vegeta Ouji? It's already five past seven. You do know he has school in the morning?"

"The important thing is he's home, isn't it?" Vegeta replied, as he shook Trunks awake. "Hey brat, wake up!"

"Hi Dad, what's up?" Trunks murmured, as he rubbed his sleepy eyes.

"It's time to go to Mom." Vegeta said, as he put him on the ground.

"Bye Pop!" Trunks smiled, as he ran into the house.

"Whatever." Vegeta mumbled, as he began to walk down the driveway.

"Aren't you goin' to say hello?" Bulma asked, as she watched Vegeta walk away.

"It's not worth it. You'll just yell at me, like Kakarot's harpy."

"Well, at least Goku says sorry, if he does something wrong." Bulma replied, folding her arms across her bosom. "And he doesn't take his children to the pub."

"Are you takin' the piss? Kakarot always takes his brats to the pub. Where else is he gonna take 'em when he's out? Work?" Vegeta laughed, as Bulma raised an eyebrow to the smirking Saiyain. "Aw crap."

"Yes crap. Goku's so gonna get you tomorrow." Bulma giggled, shutting the front door and racing to the phone to tattle on Goku.

Vegeta stood in the dark driveway, and prepared to hear the holler of Goku's voice on the horizon. All of a sudden, something hit him on the head and Vegeta looked up to see Trunks standing at his open window.

"Gotcha Dad."

"If you weren't in your mother's house, you wouldn't be getting away with that, brat." Vegeta smirked, as he picked up the piece of paper Trunks had chucked at him previously. "I'll get you the next time I see you."

"See ya at the weekend, Dad." Trunks called, as Vegeta made his way down the driveway. "Will you be at the old gym again?"

"Yes." Vegeta answered, and the click of the window shutting could be heard soon after. Vegeta's ear soon perked up when he heard a loud screech.

"VEGETA! I'M GONNA KILL YOU!"

**Later That Night**

Goku sat in Vegeta's apartment, holding a bottle of beer by the neck between two fingers. He glared at the smaller Saiyain, sitting on the sofa watching Showgirls. He didn't know how many times the man had watched that film, and Goku regretted ever giving him it; he wanted to watch it again.

"I hate you, Vegeta," Goku said, taking a gulp of his beer. "Quite a lot, right now."

"Get over yourself, Kakarot. The woman will let you back in." Vegeta grumbled, turning the volume up on the television. Chi-Chi had chucked Goku out after finding out from Bulma that Goku had taken Goten to the pub. She resented this, and saw it as a bad influence on their seven year old son, that drinking was good.

"I don't know," Goku mumbled, resting his head on the table. "She seemed pretty mad. Maybe she's chucking me out for good? This whole stripping thing was a bad idea then, if that's the case."

"Is the food here yet?"

"Hell no!"

"Then go get it!" Vegeta snapped, pointing at the door. "And kill the delivery boy while you're at it."

"But Vegeta, if I kill the delivery boy then you won't get any food."

"Why?"

"I'd have eaten it all."

"Stay the hell away from my food, lardass!" Vegeta quipped, shaking his fist at the man sitting at the table. The buzzer suddenly went off, and Vegeta pressed the button angrily, to let the boy in. A couple of minutes later, Vegeta opened the door to a spotty teenager standing with a brown paper bag in his hands. "Don't say a word, now piss off!" Vegeta snatched the food, and threw the money at the boy, and slammed the door in his face.

"Gimme," Goku begged, as Vegeta rummaged in the bag. "I'm hungry."

"No, you're on a diet," Vegeta told, sitting back down on the sofa, leaving Goku empty handed and silently crying. "You should have thought what the future might hold, Kakarot, before you let yourself go."

"But nobody came to tell me anything, so how was I supposed to know I was gonna be strippin' in my thirties?" Goku whimpered. Chi-Chi had received the call from Bulma just before dinner, and Goku was swiftly kicked out, so he was extremely hungry. "GIMME! YOU SHOULDA THOUGHT ABOUT YOUR BLABBERMOUTH WHEN YOU KNEW I WAS SITTING DOWN TO DINNER! YOU WILL FEEL MY WRATH VEGETA OUJI!

"You're on a diet." Vegeta replied nonchalantly. "You shouldn't be eating this crap. Go eat a lettuce."

"I AM NOT FAT, I'M BROAD!" Goku cried, hitting Vegeta over the head with his beer bottle, knocking him out. Goku shoved the unconscious Vegeta off the sofa, and began to tuck in. "Thank you for sharing."

**The Next Day**

"Oh great," Krillin sighed, as he set eyes on Vegeta and Goku the next day. "We have a pair of pandas in the group."

Goku and Vegeta both sat before the other three troupe members in the Job Club, both with bruises on each of their eyes. Once Vegeta had woken up from his coma after the bottle incident, he decided to attack Goku, but he fought back as well. Thus, causing two injured Saiyains.

"I'd so be kicking your ass, if I could see you right, Chrome Dome." Vegeta snarled, reaching out for Krillin.

"We're Saiyains; they'll be gone by the weekend." Goku grinned, as everyone rolled their eyes at his cheerfulness. "Just because I'm partially blind, doesn't mean I can't sense your attitudes."

"Yeah well, with you partially blind Goku, we can't practice." Yamcha sighed, slouching into his seat. "Why I'm complaining, I don't know."

"Oh, stop moaning for five minutes, Yamcha." Goku grumbled. "I swear I'll tell Bulma anyway, because you're so annoying. You only think of yourself. You don't think of what will happen to Vegeta or me if we don't do this thing."

"What will happen to Vegeta?" Raditz asked, looking at his partially blind brother.

"It's no one's business, except mine and Kakarot's." Vegeta growled, hitting the table with his fist.

"Bulma's asking for full custody of Trunks." Yamcha answered, but it was greeted with a punch in the face by Goku.

"Sorry, Vegeta couldn't reach." Goku said, resting his hand n the table again.

"PHONE? GIVE IT NOW!" Vegeta hollered, standing up from his chair. "GET ME AN EFFING PHONE!"

Yamcha rose from the ground and sat on his chair again. He looked towards Goku as he held his head.

"Does this mean I'm outta the troupe?"

"Why yes, yes it does." Goku smiled, pushing Yamcha out of his seat again. "Just promise not to say a word of this to anyone."

**End of Chapter Three**

**How did Teletubbies come into the scene? It was late at night, and tiredness makes me bonkers, XD. And Goku's hurt again! Two chapters in a row, poor Goku. Next chapter will be auditions to find a replacement for Yamcha, and the OUTFIT! Maybe some exercise for Goku too.**** Once again, thanks for all of the reviews, they mean a lot. So please, review.  
**

**As Always,**

**Thank You.**

**GokuBootz**


	4. Indecent Exposure and Fireman Goku!

_DISCLAIMER- I don't own it and I never will, unfortunately. It belongs to the great man that is, Akira Toriyama., and licensed by Toei Animation and Funimation._

**Thank You!**

**I really wanted to rewrite this chapter. I dunno, I just wasn't happy with it; it didn't seem to fit in. So, I'm writing a different Chapter Four.**

**The Full Monty**

**Chapter Four (again).**

"CHI-CHI! CHI-CHI!" Goku called from the outside his house. He was still not allowed in the house, and almost a week had passed. He was fed up of sleeping on the floor at Vegeta's; he wasn't allowed on the sofa because he wasn't good enough, and he was sick of eating take out every night. He just wanted a nice home cooked meal... plus to get in the house to retrieve something of ultimate importance. "LET ME IN! THE NEIGHBOURS ARE WATCHING!"

Chi-Chi came to the window of the living room and opened it wide. She popped her head out, followed by a large steel bucket grasped in her hands. Goku looked anxiously at his wife and then at the bucket, filled with murky water; Chi-Chi had just finished the mopping. Goku stepped back a little in fear as Chi-Chi pulled her arms back, ready to chuck the water over Goku.

"Now Chi, we don't want to make a scene, now do we?" Goku spoke shakily, as Chi-Chi's arms went further back. "What kind of image are you portraying for the kids?"

"The kids aren't here, so it doesn't count!" Chi-Chi snarled, and finally emptied her bucket over Goku, who screamed at the contact with the cold icy water. She slammed the window shut and dropped the blind.

Goku stood, drenched to the bone. His hair fell over his eyes as droplets of water fell from the tip of his nose. He decided to be on his way, and with ever step his boots made a squelching nose. As he passed people in the street, they couldn't help but stop and laugh at the drowned dog.

As he reached Penguin Street, he had had enough of the squelching and decided to chuck his boots in the nearest trash can. He then took off his fleece and wringed it in his hands, leaving him standing in a white vest, black cargo pants and a pair of bright red socks. He tied his fleece around his waist, and then tended to his flattened hair. He wringed it like his fleece and it soon began to stand on its own again. Once every spike stood again, he shook his head like a dog that had just come out of a lake.

He walked a bit farther and soon made it to the deserted gym. No one had arrived yet so he crawled through a busted window and made his way to the heater; February was not a month to get drenched by water, it was absolutely freezing. He soon began to remove his trousers and vest and set them atop the heater to dry, while he sat in his black boxers.

Fifteen minutes later, Vegeta emerged through the window with Trunks. He found Goku asleep beside the heater, clad in only his boxers. He noticed his clothes draped over the heater and smirked mischievously at Trunks.

He grabbed the clothes and handed them to Trunks, who smiled happily at his father's playful mood. Vegeta then began to give instructions to the boy, who soon scurried out the window and out of sight. Vegeta then poked Goku in the side with his foot, causing the taller Saiyain to jump out of his sleep.

"What happened to you?" Vegeta questioned, as he watched Goku rub the drowsiness from his eyes. "You fall in the canal again?"

"No, Chi threw a bucket of water over me." Goku sighed, as he reached out for his clothes, but was greeted with hot metal touching his hand. "Arghh! That smarts!"

"Why did you touch the heater?"

"My clothes were drying on it. Where are they?" Goku worried, as he began to search around the heater anxiously. They were the only clothes he had; he had been wearing them all week. He already ruined his good boots, so he couldn't lose the rest of his clothes. "They were just there?"

"There was nothing there when I came in." Vegeta lied, as he cackled evilly in his mind. "Maybe someone stole them?"

"But they're all I have! What am I gonna do?" Goku whined, as he put his head in his hands. Trunks clambered back into the room and ran towards the two men.

"Whoa, what happened to you, man?"

"My wife drenched me. By any chance did you see a man with the clothes I've been wearing for the past week?" Goku said, as Trunks tried to smile sympathetically to the man.

"Wait, are you wearing my underwear?" Vegeta growled, as he recognised the briefs. "What the hell are you doing wearing my underwear?"

"I'd already wore my underwear inside out like twice, and it wasn't making me feel any cleaner, so I nicked a pair of yours. You've got plenty," Goku grunted. "Plus a lil red number at the back of your drawer; I never knew you were so risqué."

"Stay out of my room!"

"I will, if you let me sleep on the couch?" Goku bribed, as Vegeta sighed, defeated.

"Fine!"

Trunks rose from the cold concrete floor, to greet Goten who was climbing through the window. The little boy smiled happily, as he jumped down and caught sight of his father. He ran towards him and gave him a large hug. He pulled away quickly, once he realised that his father was bare, except for a pair of underpants.

"Daddy, why are you naked?" Goten asked, cocking his head at his father. "Aren't you cold?"

"Someone stole Daddy's clothes when Daddy took them off because Mommy soaked me with a BUCKET OF MOP WATER!" Goku snarled, getting more annoyed with every word. The whole situation was beginning to get to him and he was fed up. "Do you know where my clothes are, Goten?"

"Sorry, no." Goten answered, his lip quivering a bit from his father's yelling.

"Oh, why me?" Goku groaned, as Vegeta and Trunks cackled evilly behind his back.

**A Few Hours Later**

The troupe, now minus Yamcha, had finished their practice for the day and was now huddled around the heater, where Goku was still clad in only his boxers. No one had the decency to give him their coat to keep him warm; they had a very sick sense of humour, they enjoyed other people's pain.

"I suppose I should be on my way." Krillin exclaimed, grabbing his coat. "Just like everybody else." He looked at Goku in particular, who face was blank.

"I suppose, we all better be going." Goku said, as he stood up, grabbing Goten's hand.

Everyone left, and Goku and Vegeta made their way home, with Goten and Trunks following close behind. A few passers-by looked strangely at Goku, who now seemed unaware that he was just in a pair of boxers; his body had gone numb from the cold. They made their way past Blue's, and a few wolf whistles from the women could be heard. Goku smiled broadly.

"I still got it!"

"WE LOVE YOU, VEGETA, YOU SEXY MAN BEAST!" One of the women yelled, as Vegeta smirked.

"You were saying, Kakarot?" Goku hunched his shoulders, and bowed his head. His day couldn't get any worse.

"I really shouldn't be looking at other women any ways, I got Chi!"

As fathers and sons passed a man sitting on a flattened cardboard box, Goku had to stop and have a double take. He reversed and looked at the man in shock, as did the homeless man at Goku. It wasn't every day you saw a man walking the streets in his underwear. Goku frowned and pursed his lips angrily.

"YOU'RE WEARING MY CLOTHES!"

"I'm sorry, sir?" The man asked, looking at the angered Goku.

"WHERE WERE YOU BETWEEN HALF THREE AND QUARTER TO FOUR THIS AFTERNOON?"

"Um...uh... down by the docks. A nice boy with lavender hair gave me these around that time." The homeless man explained, holding up a piece of the fleece. "They're very nice."

"OF COURSE THEY ARE, THEY'RE MINE!" Goku growled, as the man winced. Goku turned to glare at the now cackling Trunks and Vegeta. They were both holding their stomachs in pain, as they laughed endlessly. "I swear you two are going to be the death of me!"

"Would you like your clothes back, sir?" The scruffy man asked, as he began to remove the fleece.

Goku bent down and pulled the fleece down again and smiled. "No, you keep them. You'd need them for a night like this."

"Thank you, sir." The man beamed, as he hugged Goku. As he was being hugged, Goku looked at Vegeta and mouthed 'pawned'.

Vegeta turned swiftly on his heel angrily at the fact he had just been pawned by Goku. Goten and Goku followed soon after and made it to the city centre. As they did, police sirens could be heard coming towards them. They continued on their walk and took no notice, until a police car came upon the sidewalk and two police officers stood before Goku.

"I'm sorry sir, but we're going to have to take you in for indecent exposure." The female officer explained, as the male officer dangled handcuffs in his hands.

"Since when?" Goku questioned, his brow furrowing in confusion.

"We got numerous complaints of a man walking around in a pair of black briefs." The man told, pointing at Goku's choice of underwear.

"These aren't briefs, they're boxers." Goku chuckled slightly.

"I'm sorry sir, but we're going to have to take you in. Briefs or boxers, we're taking you in." The woman grunted, as the male officer took Goku's hands and cuffed them together.

"Oh, this is bogus!" Goku growled, as he was led into the police car. He then looked to Vegeta. "Take Goten home! And Goten, don't tell your mother about any of this!"

Goku was soon driven off in the back of the squad car and he looked out the window at them. Vegeta smirked at him, as he noticed his gaze. He waved and yelled.

"PAWNED, KAKAROT!"

**The Next Day**

"AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" The laughter of the Job Club could be heard from outside the door, as Goku made his way in. He had just been released with a warning, and thought it would be best if he went straight to Job Club. The station had nicely given him some clothes, and was happy he didn't have to walk around in his underwear any more. He guessed it was what he got for wearing Vegeta's underwear in the first place.

He walked in, and everyone's eyes went straight to him, and once again burst out laughing. Goku sighed, and left the room. He headed to the corner shop and bought himself an eight pack of double chocolate muffins; he was troubled.

Meanwhile, at the Job Club, everyone was gathered around the daily newspaper. Unbeknownst to Goku, a local photographer was on the prowl that night and caught the whole incident with the homeless man and the police. Krillin held the paper in his hands and the tears kept raining down his face as he began to read the article.

'_On Sunday, February 9__th__, at around eight o'clock, complaints began to arise of a man walking around in his underwear. _

_At half past eight, a disturbance began to occur near Penguin Street, were the man, believed to be Goku Son, started to harass a homeless man on the street about his clothes. The scene was witnessed by his youngest son, along with another man and his child. The witnesses seemed to be laughing, but the older men didn't seem to be intoxicated. The disturbance died down after a few minutes, and the homeless man and Son appeared to make up, and hugged, (see picture inset)._

_Ten minutes later, the group along with Son were in the town centre where they were stopped by police. Son appeared to laugh off his appearance but was handcuffed and put into the squad car, (picture right). His friend waved after him whilst laughing, and shouted 'pawned'._

_Goku Son was retained at Herculopolis Police Station for questioning, but it is known that he will only leave with a warning and a mark on his record.'_

As Krillin finished reading the article Goku trotted in the door stuffing chocolate muffins into his mouth, with his hood over his head. Everyone burst out laughing again, but he ignored them.

"Aw, this is the most awesome thing Kakarot has ever done!" Raditz laughed as he looked at the pictures of his little brother. "Dad's gonna be proud."

"Damn straight!" Goku answered, hugging his muffins to his chest. Everyone looked at him as he kept eating. "What? I'm troubled!"

"What did Chi-Chi say?" Krillin asked, as Goku shrugged his shoulders.

"I dunno, we haven't spoken since yesterday. In all fairness, it is her fault I was caught in my underwear. Trunks wouldn't have given my clothes to Scruffy if she hadn't thrown that bucket of water over me in the first place"

"He's right; it is the harpy's fault," Vegeta hissed, pinning the article to the notice board, along with Goku's others. "She should be more careful about what happens to her children."

"I am not a child!" Goku grunted, stuffing the last of the muffins into the polythene bag. Goku's phone began to ring, and Goku put it to his ear. "Hello!"

"GOKU SON, I SWEAR I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!"

"Excuse me, it's Chi-Chi!" Goku told as he walked out the door.

"Any news on how Gohan is getting on with the organising?" Krillin asked, trying to ignore the screaming of Goku coming from outside the door. "I hear he got a spot at Blues, but he said we need a name before Blue will accept."

"A name? Why the hell do we need a name for, Chrome Dome?" Vegeta grunted, glaring at Krillin.

"I guess, it hides our identity. It saves him saying all ours names, plus it will make us sound good." Krillin explained, as a disgruntled Goku re-entered the room.

"That is the final flashing I am doing!" Goku growled, slamming his phone down on the table.

"Not till after the performance, Kakarot." Raditz said, as Goku nodded.

"Final flashing... Final Flashers. We'll be the Final Flashers! It will be the only time the women will see us flashing them. That will be the once and final time, the Final Flashers!" Vegeta said, waving his finger in the air. "That will be our name, so no more suggestions."

"Okay, Final Flashers it is then." Krillin agreed, as Vegeta slammed his feet on the table.

"Can we go get drunk?" Raditz asked, as everyone looked at him strangely; it was only five minutes to twelve in the morning. "I wanna celebrate Kakarot's success of gettin' in the paper!"

"That is nothing to celebrate! All you see is my fat ass shouting at Scruffy!" Goku hissed.

"You actually don't look fat in the pictures, Goku. Have you been working out?" Krillin asked, as Goku's face lit up.

"Why yes, yes I have. Thanks for noticing." Goku gushed, blushing slightly. "I've been working super hard. I got rid of my belly. Bless us Saiyains for losing weight quickly!"

"Well, well done Goku!" Krillin smiled, as Goku grinned.

"Still, you got pawned, Kakarot." Vegeta smirked, lifting his feet from the table and headed out the door, followed closely by Raditz.

**At The Pub**

"Do you know what we should do?" Goku asked, his speech a bit slurred. He was quite tipsy, and wasn't holding his drink well. "We should try our little routine in front of some women. Like our wives or s'thing?"

"We don't have a wife like you, Kakarot!" Vegeta grunted, watching Goku tilt from side to side. Vegeta always got amused when Goku was drunk; he knew he could get him to do anything. "Why don't you do it for your wife? We're unloved."

"Aw, poor Veggie! Don't worry, you'll get Bloomers back!" Goku smiled, patting him on the head.

"Don't call my woman Bloomers!" Vegeta snarled, as everyone looked at him. "SHE'S MY WOMAN, AND SHE ALWAYS WILL BE!"

"Okay, whatever you say Vegeta." Krillin chuckled. He couldn't help but laugh at the green eyed monster that had resided in Vegeta. He couldn't believe he would be jealous of a man such as Yamcha.

"Dad, there you are!" Everyone turned around to see Gohan walking towards them with a cardboard box in his hands. "You're meant to be at Job Club. Actually, all of you are."

"You're not my mother! My mother died a long time ago!" Goku slurred, but soon broke down in tears. "MOMMY!"

"There, there Kakarot...it was all your fault!" Raditz said gently, patting his brother's head.

"Why is Dad drunk, guys?" Gohan questioned, as Krillin smiled sheepishly.

"He accidentally picked up the chocolate muffins with brandy in them this morning, when everyone was laughing at him. So, he has brandy in him plus three beers." Gohan rolled his eyes, those muffins were powerful things. It seemed they had more alcohol in them than chocolate.

"Well, I got that thing you asked for, Dad." Gohan said, handing his father the box, who just stared at it blankly. "The costume, remember?"

"Oh yeah... what costume?"

"For the show? Your fireman outfit? Dad, you're dressing as a fireman in the strip show!" Gohan said through gritted teeth. His father was incredibly dim when intoxicated, and it annoyed him immensely.

"Go put it on, Kakarot. Go on, it'll be funny!" Vegeta cackled, as he watched Goku wobble into the women's toilets. Screams were heard, and the man was swiftly shoved into the male bathrooms by Launch. "Today is gonna be fun."

Ten minutes later, Goku emerged. He had the hat draped over his face, making him blind. The coat was on the wrong way and the boots were on the wrong feet. Goku crashed into a table and fell flat on his face, whilst his friends laughed heartily, except Gohan who hid himself in his hands.

"I love drunken Kakarot; he's so much more fun!" Vegeta cackled, wiping the tears from his eyes.

Gohan rose from his seat and helped his father up. Goku seemed to be coming out of his drunken state, as he was becoming more aware of what was going on in front of him. His father's drunken states never lasted long, because as a Saiyain, his body got rid of alcohol twice as quickly as a human, so his antics only lasted half an hour or so.

"Hey son, what's going on?" Goku asked wearily, as he grabbed his head.

"You ate those brandy muffins again and got drunk. Are you okay?" Gohan explained, as Goku nodded his head. His eyes then went wide, when he noticed his attire. "Also, I brought this to you to show the guys, but they told you to put it on. You put it on the wrong way, as you can see."

"You look like a freak, just so you know Goku." Launch sneered, as she looked Goku up and down.

"Shut up, Launch!" Goku hissed, sitting down on a chair and fixing his boots to the right feet. He then put the coat the right way. He turned his hat around, and buttoned it under his chin. "There, this is the costume guys." Goku walked over to them and spun around. "My Dad's friend, Celipa, can make them for us. So, get measurements so she can begin. We only have a week and a half."

"Hey Gohan, we've decided on the Final Flashers. So, you better call Blue and get us that place." Krillin told, as Gohan nodded, taking out his phone.

"I'm gonna go see Chi-Chi again. At least in this, I'm waterproof." Goku announced, as he left the pub.

"He does know, he's gonna get looked at a whole lot more now, that he's dressed like that?" Raditz remarked.

"He's Kakarot, he's stupid!" Vegeta replied, taking a gulp from his beer. "But, I must admit, that costume is kind of cool."

_**End of Chapter Four (again)**_

_**As I said at the beginning of the chapter, I wasn't happy with the chapter four I had up before, so I rewrote it. I like this one a lot better, it fits well.**_

_**Next chapter is the underwear dilemma and a little promiscuity for one of the guys. **_

_**Thanks for the reviews and stuff, so as always please **_**REVIEW!**

**As Always,**

**Thank You!**

**GokuBootz**


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